Taking Aim p. 193
Problem I would like to solve:
Not enough time in the day.
I’ve been stuck on one behavior – 4 hours each day spent commuting and all the while wishing I was doing school work, working out at the gym, yard work . . .
The storm:
Get a small apartment near work to spend 2 or 3 nights each week (3 nights = 12 hours saved)
Move closer to work.
Work closer to home.
Move back to Chesterfield.
Sleep in the office 2 or 3 nights each week.
Stay in a fire station 2 or 3 nights each week.
I’m going to work on the apartment one and staying at a fire station. Each seem to have their drawbacks – apartment cost money, fire station with the radio, cheap beds and not home.
There may be additional cost savings with the apartment that can off-set the rent, like gas money. I’ll have to research that one.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Midless stuff
Target Practice p. 191
I will spend 20 minutes to a half hour each day doing:
Anything physical. Some of my best “ideas” (some would say lame brained) have come when I was mindlessly exercising. It’s funny, they never have come when I was out on the road or trail riding a bike or running, and they came on the treadmill, stationary bike or in the pool. I think it’s because I can be mindless – not worried about cars or stepping on a root. The monotony of the stationary machine, or that endless black line on the bottom of the pool, seems to hypnotize me and my mind wonders off of those things that normally occupy my thoughts (personnel problems at work, project deadlines, and budget presentations).
I will spend 20 minutes to a half hour each day doing:
Anything physical. Some of my best “ideas” (some would say lame brained) have come when I was mindlessly exercising. It’s funny, they never have come when I was out on the road or trail riding a bike or running, and they came on the treadmill, stationary bike or in the pool. I think it’s because I can be mindless – not worried about cars or stepping on a root. The monotony of the stationary machine, or that endless black line on the bottom of the pool, seems to hypnotize me and my mind wonders off of those things that normally occupy my thoughts (personnel problems at work, project deadlines, and budget presentations).
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Page 175 - St. Bart here I come!
Whose day did I make today (this week)? Unfortunately I can only think of one (so much for St. Bart), but that one carries some weight – my wife. After the discussion about money, I agreed to go with her to the Wine Festival in Norfolk this weekend. After all the negative money discussions, we were having a difficult time. But, with all that going on, I still made time in my busy week to carve out a Sunday trip to the Waterside for a taste of the grape. She’s excited, and I’m hammering out the school work on Saturday night to get it all done before then. Cheers
Page 170 Taking Aim - Then Duck
I actually did this with my wife, some of this I won’t go into (hope you understand) but here is the quick version.
We had some money problems a few years back – I earned it she spent it – all of it. She is of the mindset that if I have checks (or the bank card keeps working), I still have money. Over the last couple of weeks, her spend-o-rama habits have been returning – not staying on a budget, buying dinner for friends when they go out, new black shoes (there are already black shoes in the closet 4 PAIR – I don’t understand – male DNA and all that).
We went through the exercise in the book, and while time will tell and I am optimistic, the discussion did put things out on the table that at least made me feel better, and we now have a better understanding of each other’s reasons for how we feel (except I still don’t understand the shoe thing).
We had some money problems a few years back – I earned it she spent it – all of it. She is of the mindset that if I have checks (or the bank card keeps working), I still have money. Over the last couple of weeks, her spend-o-rama habits have been returning – not staying on a budget, buying dinner for friends when they go out, new black shoes (there are already black shoes in the closet 4 PAIR – I don’t understand – male DNA and all that).
We went through the exercise in the book, and while time will tell and I am optimistic, the discussion did put things out on the table that at least made me feel better, and we now have a better understanding of each other’s reasons for how we feel (except I still don’t understand the shoe thing).
Page 167 Target Practice - Problem People
A person I am having a problem with is Nick Feldman (not his real name, some of you in this class may know this person).
Something I want from this person I’m not getting is for his desire to do his job well to equal his desire to be promoted. I actually enjoy seeing people succeed, and this person wants a promotion, but he is not willing to do his current job well enough or with a degree of dedication to move forward. I have discussed this with him on a number of occasions and given him rather specific tasks, objective and time lines to meet, but to no avail. I’ve had to make recommendations to NOT promote him due to his lack of motivation to do the job. He is really killing my “fun” quotient.
I can't really tell him what I really want now, because I'm afraid that is for him to get transferred - not a good management comment. So, I will continue to tell him what I want - him to do his job - and maybe he will catch on one day.
Something I want from this person I’m not getting is for his desire to do his job well to equal his desire to be promoted. I actually enjoy seeing people succeed, and this person wants a promotion, but he is not willing to do his current job well enough or with a degree of dedication to move forward. I have discussed this with him on a number of occasions and given him rather specific tasks, objective and time lines to meet, but to no avail. I’ve had to make recommendations to NOT promote him due to his lack of motivation to do the job. He is really killing my “fun” quotient.
I can't really tell him what I really want now, because I'm afraid that is for him to get transferred - not a good management comment. So, I will continue to tell him what I want - him to do his job - and maybe he will catch on one day.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
The Indexes
Index I
There are a number of people out there who I would like to get to know. Many of them are those who I have looked up to in my career or life. I think what they have to offer me is far more than I have to offer them. I believe that I can learn from their experiences and improve on the way I interact in my work and personal life.
Index II
Rather than move toward being “in charge of something”, I’d like to get out of charge of some things. I have enough of the in charge stuff now: I’m the chairman of 3 statewide committees for different organizations, a division head in the fire department, and a co-owner of a company that is beginning to take off. I would actually like to get into something where I can be a worker bee for a change.
Index III
Something new to learn – This one I already have on the radar screen. When next semester is over (I’ll be done with my degree), I’m going to take guitar lessons. My grandfather taught me the basics many years ago, and I have a nice guitar now. I would really like to learn how to play it right.
There are a number of people out there who I would like to get to know. Many of them are those who I have looked up to in my career or life. I think what they have to offer me is far more than I have to offer them. I believe that I can learn from their experiences and improve on the way I interact in my work and personal life.
Index II
Rather than move toward being “in charge of something”, I’d like to get out of charge of some things. I have enough of the in charge stuff now: I’m the chairman of 3 statewide committees for different organizations, a division head in the fire department, and a co-owner of a company that is beginning to take off. I would actually like to get into something where I can be a worker bee for a change.
Index III
Something new to learn – This one I already have on the radar screen. When next semester is over (I’ll be done with my degree), I’m going to take guitar lessons. My grandfather taught me the basics many years ago, and I have a nice guitar now. I would really like to learn how to play it right.
Cutting Down on . . .
Activities to cut down on:
I would like to cut down on confrontational interactions with co-workers and employees. The problem is some of these activities are part of the job. When I have to council an employee on poor performance, and he or she defends their actions (or non-actions) on someone else’s back, I get irritated.
While their reactions are beyond my control, I think I can at least group these activities to minimize the number of miserable days. For example, every Tuesday is staff meeting for our department. Many of these days turn into some type of confrontation on their own in fighting (not literally) for money, people or time. I can coordinate all of those employee confrontational interactions into counseling sessions on Tuesday afternoon. This gets the multiple bad meetings into at least one day and the other 4 in the week can be the positive days.
People to cut down on:
The ex-wife. While I have at least 4 more years I will have to interact with her, every time I have to speak with her it is always something negative. I never get good news from her and when the conversation is over, I often get that burning sensation in my gut, headaches, and I’m ready to run off to an isolated Caribbean island where she can’t find me.
While I will not be able to eliminate this interaction for the foreseeable future, I can rest easy that there will be an end. In the mean time, I’ll keep the Tums, Advil and travel agent on speed dial.
I would like to cut down on confrontational interactions with co-workers and employees. The problem is some of these activities are part of the job. When I have to council an employee on poor performance, and he or she defends their actions (or non-actions) on someone else’s back, I get irritated.
While their reactions are beyond my control, I think I can at least group these activities to minimize the number of miserable days. For example, every Tuesday is staff meeting for our department. Many of these days turn into some type of confrontation on their own in fighting (not literally) for money, people or time. I can coordinate all of those employee confrontational interactions into counseling sessions on Tuesday afternoon. This gets the multiple bad meetings into at least one day and the other 4 in the week can be the positive days.
People to cut down on:
The ex-wife. While I have at least 4 more years I will have to interact with her, every time I have to speak with her it is always something negative. I never get good news from her and when the conversation is over, I often get that burning sensation in my gut, headaches, and I’m ready to run off to an isolated Caribbean island where she can’t find me.
While I will not be able to eliminate this interaction for the foreseeable future, I can rest easy that there will be an end. In the mean time, I’ll keep the Tums, Advil and travel agent on speed dial.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Wheel inside the wheel
Love:
Wife, kids, friends, job
Power:
Job, kids, wife (this one works both ways-sometimes), motorcycle, sailboats
Freedom:
Wife, friends, job, sailboats, motorcycle, bicycle
Fun:
Wife, kids, friends, sailboats, motorcycle, bicycle
I feel like the wheel is pretty well balanced, but Love is pretty limited in the numbers. I guess the wife and kids fill such the large part of this, I don’t feel like it is lacking in my life.
It seems like each thing in my wheel meet two or more needs. Sometimes I think they meet the need on a limited basis in others the same person or thing is the major factor in that spoke of the wheel.
Wife, kids, friends, job
Power:
Job, kids, wife (this one works both ways-sometimes), motorcycle, sailboats
Freedom:
Wife, friends, job, sailboats, motorcycle, bicycle
Fun:
Wife, kids, friends, sailboats, motorcycle, bicycle
I feel like the wheel is pretty well balanced, but Love is pretty limited in the numbers. I guess the wife and kids fill such the large part of this, I don’t feel like it is lacking in my life.
It seems like each thing in my wheel meet two or more needs. Sometimes I think they meet the need on a limited basis in others the same person or thing is the major factor in that spoke of the wheel.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Chapter 2 Exercises
What I have:
A great job
A fantastic family
A reasonable retirement fund
Three fun filled dogs
A motorcycle
From others:
Affection and love from the wife, kids and dogs
Responsibility and authority in my job
Lessons in life and experiences well beyond what I could have achieved on my own
What I’ve done right:
Made the decision to come back to my job in Chesterfield
Pursued my college degree
Allowed my wife to pursue her career and drag me along with her to another home
Supported my kids at every opportunity
What I really want:
To live on a sailboat in the Caribbean with my wife
L – I love being on the water, I love my wife and she loves me and being on the water. A perfect match
P – The power associated with controlling the course, destination and when you travel by sail provides you FR – Freedom.
Something I could add:
More time – I find myself multi-tasking frequently to the point I sometimes worry that I am not putting the full effort into the tasks at hand.
It would meet my need for:
Power – I would feel more in control of the tasks and the destiny that I am heading for.
A great job
A fantastic family
A reasonable retirement fund
Three fun filled dogs
A motorcycle
From others:
Affection and love from the wife, kids and dogs
Responsibility and authority in my job
Lessons in life and experiences well beyond what I could have achieved on my own
What I’ve done right:
Made the decision to come back to my job in Chesterfield
Pursued my college degree
Allowed my wife to pursue her career and drag me along with her to another home
Supported my kids at every opportunity
What I really want:
To live on a sailboat in the Caribbean with my wife
L – I love being on the water, I love my wife and she loves me and being on the water. A perfect match
P – The power associated with controlling the course, destination and when you travel by sail provides you FR – Freedom.
Something I could add:
More time – I find myself multi-tasking frequently to the point I sometimes worry that I am not putting the full effort into the tasks at hand.
It would meet my need for:
Power – I would feel more in control of the tasks and the destiny that I am heading for.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Chapter 1 When I got it or didn't get it
I got what I wanted when:
I purchased my motorcycle last year. For one of the first rides to get through the break in period, I just went “that way”. I was relaxed, calm and peaceful. The feeling of freedom was refreshing and revived me for the coming week. While this is not really a work related example, it is my work and the flexibility I frequently have allowed me the time off to take this ride.
While working as a team at the recent building collapse, one of the lieutenants and I coordinated and divided the work load to keep it manageable. After an initial out of control felling, we were able to get organized and effectively divide the work responsibilities and accomplish our goals. While I was in charge, Matt became the face and voice of the incident for local and national media during press briefings broadcast live, a job he has never done before and was nervous about. After coaching and reviewing what was going to happen, how he could handle the situation, and assuring him he would do a great job, I was proud of him and our department for how we managed the public message, mostly because my power and belonging needs were met.
Every time I get a hug from my kids, no words, just the physical hug around the neck. They are teenagers now so they are going at warp speed with school, band, friends, sports, etc., so when I get those simple show of affection, I get that warm all over feeling again. Again, not work related, but one of the most important to me.
I didn’t get what I wanted when:
Again, working at the building collapse, I knew there was more information we could and should release about the incident, but those in charge were not willing to do so. I was not in control of the details but felt that the release of that information would clear up considerable confusion. I did not have the power in that situation and it caused the tension I felt in the early hours of the operation.
I couldn’t get on the motorcycle this week because of a work commitment. There was a 9/11 memorial ride to DC and I could not go due to work commitment. I missed the need for freedom and Friday at about the time they were leaving, I got that depressed feeling of wanting to go with the ride.
Sitting here now, knowing that with Ike hitting Texas, our department may be requested to respond much like we did in Katrina. Also knowing that I will not be able to go because of a commitment to the International Code Hearings in the next week, I will not be able to be involved in the response effort. It is frustrating because I was kept from the Katrina response as well because of similar things.
I purchased my motorcycle last year. For one of the first rides to get through the break in period, I just went “that way”. I was relaxed, calm and peaceful. The feeling of freedom was refreshing and revived me for the coming week. While this is not really a work related example, it is my work and the flexibility I frequently have allowed me the time off to take this ride.
While working as a team at the recent building collapse, one of the lieutenants and I coordinated and divided the work load to keep it manageable. After an initial out of control felling, we were able to get organized and effectively divide the work responsibilities and accomplish our goals. While I was in charge, Matt became the face and voice of the incident for local and national media during press briefings broadcast live, a job he has never done before and was nervous about. After coaching and reviewing what was going to happen, how he could handle the situation, and assuring him he would do a great job, I was proud of him and our department for how we managed the public message, mostly because my power and belonging needs were met.
Every time I get a hug from my kids, no words, just the physical hug around the neck. They are teenagers now so they are going at warp speed with school, band, friends, sports, etc., so when I get those simple show of affection, I get that warm all over feeling again. Again, not work related, but one of the most important to me.
I didn’t get what I wanted when:
Again, working at the building collapse, I knew there was more information we could and should release about the incident, but those in charge were not willing to do so. I was not in control of the details but felt that the release of that information would clear up considerable confusion. I did not have the power in that situation and it caused the tension I felt in the early hours of the operation.
I couldn’t get on the motorcycle this week because of a work commitment. There was a 9/11 memorial ride to DC and I could not go due to work commitment. I missed the need for freedom and Friday at about the time they were leaving, I got that depressed feeling of wanting to go with the ride.
Sitting here now, knowing that with Ike hitting Texas, our department may be requested to respond much like we did in Katrina. Also knowing that I will not be able to go because of a commitment to the International Code Hearings in the next week, I will not be able to be involved in the response effort. It is frustrating because I was kept from the Katrina response as well because of similar things.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
In Pursuit of Happiness - initial thoughts
My initial impression of the introduction chapter was how these basic needs match up with Maslow's theory on the hierarchy of needs.
The love need in Pursuit of Happiness is closely associated with Maslow's social needs. That includes the familial as well as more intimate social needs. If you can meet Maslows social needs, you can meet the need of love as outlined by Good.
The other needs are not as closely associated, but paralles between Good and Maslow are easy to draw. For the needs of power, fun and freedom, I think they can be met with various aspects of Maslow's esteem and self actualization levels.
I am looking forward to reading further to see if Good ties these two theories together or if I can see more of a connection.
The love need in Pursuit of Happiness is closely associated with Maslow's social needs. That includes the familial as well as more intimate social needs. If you can meet Maslows social needs, you can meet the need of love as outlined by Good.
The other needs are not as closely associated, but paralles between Good and Maslow are easy to draw. For the needs of power, fun and freedom, I think they can be met with various aspects of Maslow's esteem and self actualization levels.
I am looking forward to reading further to see if Good ties these two theories together or if I can see more of a connection.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
The Picture
I got a couple of comments about the picture. It's a small island in the British Virgin Islands called Green Cay. It's only about 300 yards long by 200 yards wide. We go up into the protected side and drop anchor for the day and swim with the turtles, dive on the outer reef. A perfect white sandy beach.
I've been there a couple of times bareboating on a sailboat, sailing around the islands, diving pristine reefs, and sampling the best rum drinks in the world. I can't wait for May, I'm going back!
I've been there a couple of times bareboating on a sailboat, sailing around the islands, diving pristine reefs, and sampling the best rum drinks in the world. I can't wait for May, I'm going back!
Hanna Aftermath
Fortunately, not much in the way of damage in the county. A lot of small tree limbs on the ground at home. I live a lot closer to the coast (by about 60 miles) and I think we got much more in the way of wind here after talking to some of the guys back at work.
I hope everyone else made out well also.
I'm still trying to figure this blog out, particularly how to follow and post to other blogs.
jrd
I hope everyone else made out well also.
I'm still trying to figure this blog out, particularly how to follow and post to other blogs.
jrd
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Hurricane Season
Well, it's official. The fear I had getting into three classes this semester would provide the inspiration for all manner of disasters and mayhem that impair my ability to put time into the classes.
It's now almost 9pm, I've been in on 2 planning meetings today, 2 scheduled for tomorrow and I'm scheduled to work the EOC from 1800 - 0600 Friday evening. Maybe the hurricane won't hit until after 0600 and I can get some school work done overnight - only if my luck changes.
Good luck to everyone with Hanna and Ike - that's the one that's worrying me.
jrd
It's now almost 9pm, I've been in on 2 planning meetings today, 2 scheduled for tomorrow and I'm scheduled to work the EOC from 1800 - 0600 Friday evening. Maybe the hurricane won't hit until after 0600 and I can get some school work done overnight - only if my luck changes.
Good luck to everyone with Hanna and Ike - that's the one that's worrying me.
jrd
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
